LOL, Universe!

Have you ever had something happen in your life that made you say, "Haha, God. That was a good one. Joke's over"? Up until now, that had only happened once in my life and that was when my Dad died. It was such a huge shock that I felt like the universe was playing a trick on me. "LOL, universe!" I was wrong though and it was very, very real. :( That doesn't mean, however, that I'm not convinced that this world of ours doesn't have a sense of humor. Let me tell you about my second experience with that omniscient prankster of ours...

Murphy's Law has been the predominant theme for nearly every aspect of my MBA application process. (Hmmm, maybe Dad dying wasn't the most appropriate comparison. Woops.) If you haven't yet heard me rant and rave about it, here is a brief synopsis: School loses my GMAT score; school claims to have found my score then marks file complete; school apparently places the wrong student's score report in my file and asks me if I plan to retake the test because they've never accepted a score that low; after receiving an emotional plea to please make sure they review the right score, school decides not to personally respond and to send an automated email saying "Your application is now complete." That's funny, I thought it already was...

But wait, there's more... Personally I think this is where the story gets good. As soon as the GMAT drama was cleared up, school invites me in for an interview. "This is good," I thought to myself, "I am one step closer to being done with this process!" Two days later I showed up for what I now consider the universe's second big attempt at humor in my life. I'll give you the play by play. Why not?

The interview started at 4PM so I showed up promptly at 3:50 PM and announced that I was there for an interview with John. I looked good. This was a business school interview after all so I wore a suit, heels, simple jewelry, and carried a professional looking padfolio with an extra copy of my resume, just-in-case. My heart raced as I waited for John to greet me. In the mean time, a guy wearing worn in Levis and a button down shirt walked into the office and announced that he too was there for a 4PM appointment with John. "Is there another John?" I wondered. I started to worry that I had written my interview time down incorrectly and that I was an hour late or an hour early. What was going on?! I was a wreck.

At 4PM on the dot, John came over and greeted US. Apparently he had decided we didn't need to know it was a group interview in advance. He said, "We like to do the MBA interviews like this because it will be similar to the interaction you'll have in your cohort." We introduced ourselves, broke the ice and then dove into the questions.

Ok, I might have been jumping the gun earlier because THIS is where the story really gets good... The first question was, "Why do you think getting an MBA will help you attain your career goals? Why this school?" Homeboy to the left answered and this is what I heard: "Bla bla bla bla carbon trading bla bla more science stuff bla bla sustainability...Portland is green bla bla bla." Oh great. I hope we aren't competing against each other. I answered the question a bit more succinctly and if you know me at all, you know what I said.

The next question asked us to "Describe your path and how you came to want an MBA." Easy enough, right? This is when I started thinking I was either in the middle of a Saturday Night Live episode or being video taped for America's Funniest Home Videos. Apparently my group interview partner already has an undergrad degree and Ph.D. in molecular biology. MOLECULAR BIOLOGY?! Are you joking me? PH.D.? Really God?! Seriously?! He had also started his own architectural design firm and aspires to get into designing more environmentally efficient buildings. In case you are wondering, I also think it is safe to assume that he enjoys pina coladas and long walks in the sand.

The next question was the type of question that, when prepping for the interview, I told myself there was no way in hell they would ask. In my opinion, it is in line with the question, "Tell me about an activity you are involved in." I mean, bottom line, you could just lie and its not like they'd ever know the difference. "I'm really into canoeing," I could reply. Who's going to argue with that? I digress. The next question sucked.

"How would your coworkers describe you?" Are you for real? My coworkers hate me. How am I supposed to answer a question like that. (To all my coworkers reading this right now, all 2 of you, you know what I'm talking about.) So what did I answer? I completely stumbled on this one, probably more than I've EVER stumbled on an interview question. I said something about being positive, energetic, and a go to gal for getting things done. Whatever. I should have just tried harder to make up something more awesome than that because my pal sitting next to me must have studied the effing thesaurus the night before. His answer; "My coworkers consider me intelligent, motivated, fastidious, ya da ya da ya da..." Once again: Are you kidding me? Intelligent?! That must be a guy thing because I would NEVER assume anyone thought I was intelligent, even if they had said it to my face five times. No way! Someone needs a lesson in humility. Then again, this was probably one of those times in life where you are supposed to brag. Oops.

Is this interview over yet?!

The final question was pretty lame too. "What contribution do you think you would make to your cohort in the MBA program?" Honestly this is another question I really didn't think they would ask. Once again, it is the type of question that just begs for lies in response. I think I'll bring awesome. Who cares? I'll bring chocolate? Not what you're looking for, huh? Oh well. Nonetheless, I think I finished on a strong note, answering that I realized I'd be on the younger end of the spectrum but that I thought it was really important to have the perspective of someone from Gen Y in the group since, statistically, we are taking over the work force... Ok those weren't my exact words, but you knew what I meant. I also said that my level of focus on my studies would be another contribution I'd make to the program. I said that I was afraid I'd let my undergraduate education just "happen to me" but that I was now ready to drive my education and get the most out of every moment. This seemed like a good enough answer at the time and it helped me establish a better sense of rapport with ol' John-John because he seemed to really "get" what I was saying about not wanting to let my education just happen to me and really WANTING this.

I was so relieved to be done with the questions. As I had become more relaxed throughout the interview, I think my potential peer had done the opposite. I could tell he was more nervous because he kept getting a little bit over excited during his answers and he'd raise his voice or talk too fast. Too make matters worse (please don't forget that he was wearing JEANS to the interview) his phone went off half way through and instead of turning it all the way off, he just silenced the call so when that person finished their voicemail, his phone beeped again.WTF?! Isn't turning your cell phone off beforehand part of Interview Etiquette 101? What is this, amateur hour?!

So, I think I've done a pretty good job of establishing the fact that I was overwhelmed by my co-interviewee's level of experience and education. I mean, I was really blown away by his qualifications! So imagine my surprise when he began answering the contribution question by saying, "Well, I'm on the other end of the Generational Spectrum as a member of Gen X. We're the wandering slackers..."

"Clearly that's not the case," I blurted out. I couldn't help myself. We all had a good laugh about that one and then, after he talked about himself for a good five more minutes, the interview was finally finished. Thank you, God.

So that was that. I've never felt worse about an interview so I'm not exactly optimistic about getting into that school... Ya da ya da ya da.